Are Photographers Telling the Couple’s Story, or Their Own?

Are Photographers Telling the Couple’s Story, or Their Own?

It’s a question more of us in the industry should probably sit with.
Because as wedding photography becomes increasingly styled, curated, and “on-brand,” I can’t help but wonder…

Are we really telling the couple’s story… or just retelling our own?

Don’t get me wrong, every artist has a ‘voice’. A signature and this is one of the KEY reasons you should be paying close attention to who you choose. The aesthetic is a natural part that draws couples to us in the first place. But dig deeper than that and you’ll perhaps start to see every gallery starts to feel like a creative template, same tones, same compositions, same poses… It begs the question: who’s story is this, really?

Sometimes, photos reflect the photographer’s aesthetic more than the couple’s actual energy and that’s where it becomes a mistake… a costly one.
Muted tones? Serious expressions? Carefully constructed composition? It can all look beautiful. But what if the couple were silly? Vibrant? Joyful? What if their wedding was full of colour and chaos and weirdness, and the final gallery looks like a styled shoot?

That disconnect REALLY matters.

Because when art becomes the priority over authenticity, we lose something vital.

When the goal is to make “content,” build a portfolio, or go viral, rather than to witness real connection, the story becomes less about the people in front of the lens and more about the person behind it. And that shifts EVERYTHING.

The work, no matter how technically impressive, can start to feel emotionally hollow and some couples might be ok with that! Maybe all they want is the aesthetically amazing photos.

But I promise they’ll notice. They might not be able to articulate it right away, but they’ll feel it (or more accurately, they won’t!). It’s that sense of “we’re not really in these photos.” That subtle ache of being seen, but not truly known.

Sometimes direction crosses over into control.

And it’s not always intentional. We want to guide, to shape, to “elevate the story.” But in doing so, we can inadvertently script moments that weren’t meant to be staged. Moments that serve our portfolio more than the couple’s lived experience.

So what do we do?

We start by listening. More than we direct.
We stay curious. We ask better questions. Who are they, really? What do they value? What does love feel like to them, not just what it looks like? And we let that shape the way we shoot. We let them lead the tone. The pace. The feeling.

Because the most meaningful galleries don’t just reflect our style, they reflect the couple’s truth.

The goal isn’t to erase our voice as photographers. It’s to make sure it’s in service to their story, not the other way around.

When we get that right?

The photos don’t just look good… They feel right.
And that’s where the real art lives.